Days 88-92: Prague and Cesky Krumlov, Czech Republic

I think it would have been almost impossible for Prague to live up to my expectations. It's undoubtedly beautiful- narrow cobbled lanes, a stunning city square an imposing castle and cathedral lording it over the city from nearby hills. And a pint of beer will set you back much less than $2, so long as you avoid the tourist traps.

But then there are the tourists. Even in June, which is the recommended time to travel ("avoid the crowds in July and August") the place is thronging with them. And they all seem to be in tour groups- you can't round a corner without being nearly trampled by 42 croc-wearing Germans, or having your eye put out by a tour leader brandishing a pink ribbon on a stick, the rallying standard for the fat, lazy, unimaginative and ignorant that comprise a Prague tour group.

Not that I have a problem with tourists. Obviously I am one myself- the dorky backpack and utilitarian trousers are confirmation of that. But that doesn't mean I want to spend my time surrounded by a tour guide, hearing the guide drone on about how exactly 12,336 stones were used to construct this bridge, while the jowls of the tourists flubber as they nod in sage agreement, as if they knew that all along. And I do object when their mouth-breathing, painful pace across the road obstructs me on my way to a refreshing pilsen.

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So, after a day and a half it's time to head for the hills, via train to the town of Cesky Krumlov. It's a small Bohemian village, surrounded by hills and a winding river that snakes its way through the town center a number of time. A massive castle sits overlooking the town, but in a benevolent, Bohemian way, all soft edges and warm colours, rather than the imposing, kneel-before-me-puny-mortal starknesss of Gothic architecture. Fairy tales have been inspired by, and set in, this town, and more recently it was used as the location for the splatter-porn movie Hostel.

And it's mercifully free of tourists. Time to enjoy a quiet beer in an empty cafe, listening to the sounds of the river as the castle smiles down.